I had earlier promised to myself that I will post one blog every month. Unfortunately, as you can see, it has not happened for a long long time. Anyways, back again... though no promises this time.
Its been a while since I have moved to Delhi. My initial plans were to stick to Kerala and practice as a trial court lawyer earning pennies. However, I was desperate to come back to Delhi and stay with my parents as soon as I was done with college, due to my then state of mind. I landed here, did an internship in a big law firm, got enrolled as a lawyer here and changed my line of thought. It was probably because I felt that I wasn't ready to go back to Kerala. But, never knew that I'll stick to Delhi until I got a job which I realised could increase the size of my wallet quite quickly.
Never liked Delhi that much. I still don't. The people are obnoxious, less helpful, and social only with the people of their own class or higher. I love Bombay alias Mumbai (I think Bombay is a much cooler name). Given below is a para quoted from the book "Shantaram" by Gregory David Roberts.
"The first thing I noticed about Bombay, on the first day, was the smell of the different air. I could smell it before I saw or heard anything of India, even as I walked along the umbilical corridor that connected the plane to the airport. I was excited and delighted by it, in the first Bombay minute, escaped from prison and new to the wide world, but I didn't and couldn't recognise it. I know now that it's the sweet, sweating smell of hope, which is the opposite of hate;and it's the sour, stifled smell of greed, which is the opposite of love It's the smell of gods, demons, empirees, and civilsations in resurrection and decay. It's he blue skin-smell of the sea, no matter where you are in the Island CIty, and the blood-metal smell of machines. It smells of the stir and sleep and waste of sixty million animals, more than half of them humans and rats. It smells ofr heartbreak, and the struggle to live, and of the crucial failures andloves that produce our courage. It smells of ten thousand restaurants, five thousand temples, shrines, churches, and mosques, and of a hundred bazaars devoted exclusively to perfumes, spices, incense, and freshly cut flowers, Karla once called it the worst good smell in the world, and she was right, of course, in that way she had of being right about things. But whenever I return to Bombay, now it's my first sense of the city --that smell, above all things-- that welcomes me and tells me I've come home.."
Subtract, Karla and prison, and my feelings about Bombay have almost been the same. My close friends have ended up in Bombay and I am kind of stuck in Delhi. Now that my parents have also moved out, I feel even more stuck here. I have thought of leaving Delhi and going to Bombay quite a number of times. Had I gone ahead and moved to Bombay, it would have meant jumping the gun. When I sit and brood over it, I feel that from a career point of view, Delhi is the place meant for me. Somehow I feel that I'll do much better here than if I were in Bombay (hunches!). I am working in the same big law firm where I had earlier interned, in their dispute resolution team. The kind of exposure I am getting here is worth promulgating.
I have always lived a middle class life throughout my life. As human beings, one can never be satisfied with what he or she has. Greed is something that is within. Just that it shouldn't be explicit. Keep advicing people not to be greedy even if you are as greedy as the person to whom you are giving the advice.
Delhi is a place of show-off. You can't judge a person by his/her looks here. For example, a hot looking woman wearing an expensive piece of clothe could be from a not-so-well-off family residing in a single room DDA apartment with the other three (or more) members of that family. When I used to stay at Pandara Road, one of our neighbour's maid's daughter got married. The ceremony was so pompous that if a South Indian sees this marriage, he/she would have to be slapped twice to make him/ her believe that the marriage is actually that of a house maid's daughter. If a Delhiite earns 1000 bucks, 2000 would be the expenditure and if on occasions, "should" be the expenditure.
One of my friend who is just 2-3 years senior to me became independent as a lawyer few months back. He told me, that if you invest more in becoming an exhibitionist, clients will come to you in a place like Delhi. And they would have absolutely no remorse in paying. He got married and is staying with his wife (who is also my senior) in a very decent 3 bedroom apartment at Indirapuram, which is very impressive for a man of his age. Of course he has worked extremely hard for this.
I have found it strenuous to adopt to this poseur lifestyle. But, I think I already have started inculcating many features of such a life. My dad says that my standard has become very high, and I get into arguments with my mom whenever she asks me to save the money that I get. I have started deposit accounts which I feel is sufficient saving.
There have been 4-5 earthquakes atleast since I have moved to Delhi, the summers are getting hotter and winters are getting colder year after year. Every year a new record is set which makes me think like a pessimist- that the world is going to collapse any moment and I need to live the way I have dreamt off NOW. I have kept my immediate wish-list ready and expect to fulfil each and every one of them in the next couple of years. Then I can think of running a family if there is no catastrophe. But the fulcrum of all this is indeed the environment that I live in. In the land of netas and top class lifestyle, I definitely don't want to look tiny.
At the end of the day, its only an incentive for my growth. I don't want to look into the moralilty revolving around this. Being good is indeed difficult. That's one lesson which the epic Mahabharata can teach us all as Gurcharan Das has elaborated in his book "Difficulty of being Good." There is hardly any time to ponder over whether something is good or bad. Its all about being happy and not getting into trouble. Theres so much to do, learn and experience in a span of an average 60-70 years. So grab the opportunity when you get and just go for it. On that note I realise how long my post is already and how much patience is required to go through this.
P.S :- My thoughts can be contradictory to a lot of people reading this. If you find it demoralising some way or the other, I beg your pardon. Just running thoughts!
Subtract, Karla and prison, and my feelings about Bombay have almost been the same. My close friends have ended up in Bombay and I am kind of stuck in Delhi. Now that my parents have also moved out, I feel even more stuck here. I have thought of leaving Delhi and going to Bombay quite a number of times. Had I gone ahead and moved to Bombay, it would have meant jumping the gun. When I sit and brood over it, I feel that from a career point of view, Delhi is the place meant for me. Somehow I feel that I'll do much better here than if I were in Bombay (hunches!). I am working in the same big law firm where I had earlier interned, in their dispute resolution team. The kind of exposure I am getting here is worth promulgating.
I have always lived a middle class life throughout my life. As human beings, one can never be satisfied with what he or she has. Greed is something that is within. Just that it shouldn't be explicit. Keep advicing people not to be greedy even if you are as greedy as the person to whom you are giving the advice.
Delhi is a place of show-off. You can't judge a person by his/her looks here. For example, a hot looking woman wearing an expensive piece of clothe could be from a not-so-well-off family residing in a single room DDA apartment with the other three (or more) members of that family. When I used to stay at Pandara Road, one of our neighbour's maid's daughter got married. The ceremony was so pompous that if a South Indian sees this marriage, he/she would have to be slapped twice to make him/ her believe that the marriage is actually that of a house maid's daughter. If a Delhiite earns 1000 bucks, 2000 would be the expenditure and if on occasions, "should" be the expenditure.
One of my friend who is just 2-3 years senior to me became independent as a lawyer few months back. He told me, that if you invest more in becoming an exhibitionist, clients will come to you in a place like Delhi. And they would have absolutely no remorse in paying. He got married and is staying with his wife (who is also my senior) in a very decent 3 bedroom apartment at Indirapuram, which is very impressive for a man of his age. Of course he has worked extremely hard for this.
I have found it strenuous to adopt to this poseur lifestyle. But, I think I already have started inculcating many features of such a life. My dad says that my standard has become very high, and I get into arguments with my mom whenever she asks me to save the money that I get. I have started deposit accounts which I feel is sufficient saving.
There have been 4-5 earthquakes atleast since I have moved to Delhi, the summers are getting hotter and winters are getting colder year after year. Every year a new record is set which makes me think like a pessimist- that the world is going to collapse any moment and I need to live the way I have dreamt off NOW. I have kept my immediate wish-list ready and expect to fulfil each and every one of them in the next couple of years. Then I can think of running a family if there is no catastrophe. But the fulcrum of all this is indeed the environment that I live in. In the land of netas and top class lifestyle, I definitely don't want to look tiny.
At the end of the day, its only an incentive for my growth. I don't want to look into the moralilty revolving around this. Being good is indeed difficult. That's one lesson which the epic Mahabharata can teach us all as Gurcharan Das has elaborated in his book "Difficulty of being Good." There is hardly any time to ponder over whether something is good or bad. Its all about being happy and not getting into trouble. Theres so much to do, learn and experience in a span of an average 60-70 years. So grab the opportunity when you get and just go for it. On that note I realise how long my post is already and how much patience is required to go through this.
P.S :- My thoughts can be contradictory to a lot of people reading this. If you find it demoralising some way or the other, I beg your pardon. Just running thoughts!
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